


Unfinished Business

by Grinder1833



Series: Missing Moments [27]
Category: As the World Turns
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-08
Updated: 2012-02-08
Packaged: 2017-10-30 19:07:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/335090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grinder1833/pseuds/Grinder1833
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Noah has left for the rehab center and Luke misses him terribly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unfinished Business

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers: Up through November 30, 2009
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. They are the property of "As the World Turns" and P&G.
> 
> Author's Note: Another installment in my Missing Moments series. It always bothered me that we never found out what happened to Luke and Noah's apartment after Noah's accident. This is my attempt to try to fix that issue. A special THANK YOU goes out to "noelleleithe" for the beta.

The house felt empty without Noah. Luke could already feel the difference, even though it hadn’t even been twenty-four hours since Noah had left for the rehab facility in Lake Forest. Luke missed him terribly. It didn’t matter if Noah had spent most of the time he’d been out of the hospital pissed – mostly at him. Noah was still Noah – blind or not. Unfortunately, Noah didn’t share the same philosophy.

Luke kept trying to convince himself it was a good thing Noah was going to get some help…learn how to start to deal and live with his blindness. The professionals at the center would be able to get through to Noah to work with him. 

Well…that was what Luke kept trying to convince himself. He hoped that Noah didn’t feel like he was being abandoned, but Luke was at a loss as to how to help him. Noah hadn’t been responding well to any of Luke’s attempts, getting angrier with him each time Luke tried. Luke prayed that someone – anyone – would be able to get through to his boyfriend. 

But no matter how hard he tried, Luke couldn’t shake the unease he was feeling. Everything in his life felt so fucking wrong. Noah was gone – albeit temporarily. God…it better be temporary. Luke didn’t know what he’d do if Noah decided that he didn’t want to come back to Oakdale, back to Luke.

No…he wouldn’t even entertain that thought.

Noah loved him. He’d said so before he’d left for Lake Forest. Luke had been clinging to those words as if they were a life preserver to prevent him from drowning. If Noah still loved him then maybe he’d find a way to forgive him for the accident. As long as they continued to love each other there was hope.

Luke wandered into his old bedroom, the room that Noah had been occupying since he’d returned from the hospital. The room now looked more like a guest room than the bedroom that had once been his before he moved into the apartment. He sat down on the mattress and grabbed one of the pillows, bringing it up to his nose, deeply inhaling. 

Mmmm…it still smelled like Noah. 

Luke closed his eyes, savoring the scent. For a brief moment he felt at peace, as if Noah were right there in the room with him, but as soon as he opened his eyes he was hit with the harsh reality. Noah was gone. All that was left were the items of clothing he’d opted not to take with him. 

Luke ran his hand along the mattress, thinking about the many times they’d made love on it – some of those times had even been in this room. Their very first time had been in here – the most perfect first time, as far as Luke was concerned. Noah had stayed in this room with Luke after Noah had been shot. Countless hours were spent in here, healing together from the kidnapping – Noah from his gunshot wound and Luke from Zoe’s attempted rape. 

After the accident, Luke had hoped that they’d be able to do it again, but Noah didn’t want him in the room or in his bed – this all but gutted Luke, who took it as the ultimate rejection. His mom had tried to reassure him that Noah just needed some space and time. 

Well…now they had plenty of space between them. 

Unable to handle the flood of emotions that were assaulting him, Luke fled the room, nearly knocking Faith over as he made a mad dash for the staircase. 

“Watch where you’re going!” Faith shouted at him.

But Luke didn’t stop to apologize. He kept going until he was in the basement, which now contained what had been his life with Noah. Stacked in the middle of it were Noah’s movie posters that used to hang in their apartment, the furniture, and boxes of dishes, pots and pans, as well as Noah’s precious DVDs that he could no longer watch.

Tears filled Luke’s eyes as he scanned their stuff that had been so haphazardly packed away. Damian had movers pack up the apartment in the dead of the night like some black ops mission. It turned Luke’s stomach how easily Damian had been able to make Luke’s life at the apartment all but disappear. He hadn’t even been told that this was going to be handled. Luke had come home from visiting Noah in the hospital to find his bed back in his room at his mom’s house like it had never been moved in the first place.

The lease on the apartment expired at the end of the year, and Luke had hoped that he and Noah would be able to move back in and try to resume their life together. Luke had been furious when he learned of Damian’s actions. Damian had tried to smooth things over by saying that he wanted to spare him from the burden – yes _burden_ – of packing up the apartment. His mom had stood by Damian’s side, defending his actions, which she seemed to be doing quite frequently lately. 

Luke was hit by the sudden urge to see the apartment again. He still had his key. Not wanting to waste another minute, Luke sprinted up the basement steps, seeking out his key ring, which he’d left on the desk in the family room. Shifting through the keys, he realized that the key to the apartment was missing. He yanked open one of the desk drawers, burrowing through it but found nothing.

“Fuck,” he hissed, pulling the next drawer open. The key had to be somewhere. It wasn’t in the second drawer either. “Fuck!” he exclaimed, slamming the drawer shut.

“Luke, what on earth are you doing?” Lily asked, hurrying into the room.

“Where is my key to the apartment?” 

“Baby, Damian and I took care of everything at the apartment –”

“Where is the key to my apartment?” Luke demanded. “I want to go to my apartment!” He felt like a two year old throwing a tantrum, but he didn’t care. He was fucking sick and tired of being protected and ‘handled’ like he was some fragile China doll. 

Lily cautiously approached him. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“I don’t care what you think. Just give me the god damned key!”

In a flash, Damian was in the room by Lily’s side. “Luciano, don’t talk to your mother that way! What is going on here?”

Luke folded his arms across his chest. “I want the key to my apartment. I want it _now_.”

Damian shook his head. “No, there is nothing for you there anymore. You don’t need to go back to that place ever again.”

“ _That place_ was my home with Noah,” Luke spat. “ _That place_ means a lot to me and I want to see it again.”

Lily placed a gentle hand on Luke’s arm, trying to calm him. “Baby, I don’t think it’s a good idea – especially when you’re so upset.”

“Your mother is right,” Damian said, wrapping his arm around Lily’s waist. “Your psyche is fragile and –”

“Don’t you presume to think you know anything about my psyche,” Luke countered. “If you did, you wouldn’t act as if my life with Noah didn’t mean a damn thing – that it was something that could be easily boxed up and swept under the rug.”

“We’d never think that,” Lily gasped.

“Then why would you just move everything out of the apartment without asking me first?”

“Son, we wanted to help you,” Damian said.

“Like you helped me with Professor Jarvis?” Luke countered. He knew it was hitting below the belt, but he didn’t care. His life was a fucking mess because of Damian’s ‘help’. “A lot of good that did me! Noah is blind now and blames me – all because of your _help_. Was that the plan? Maybe you weren’t so happy about Noah and me living together after all.”

“Stop it, Luke!” Lily cried. “Please stop!”

Damian placed his hands on Luke’s shoulders, forcing Luke to look at him. “Luciano, that is nonsense. I have nothing but the highest regard for Noah. I wouldn’t have adopted him if I didn’t. I regret that my actions have caused you so much pain, but I did what I did out of my love for you.”

A chill ran down Luke’s spine. Those words sounded eerily familiar. Hadn’t Luke claimed the same thing with Noah? My god, he was turning into his father. Luke stepped away from his parents, quickly shaking off the thought. 

No…he’d never allow himself to turn into Damian. Luke had learned from his mistake. It would never happen again.

“I just want my key,” he said quietly.

“Baby, I still don’t think it’s a good idea,” Lily told him.

“Cara,” Damian spoke up, “Luciano is an adult. If he insists on returning to that apartment, we can’t stop him. Get our son the key.”

Lily sadly shook her head and then turned on her heel, heading out of the room. 

“Thank you,” Luke said, getting his coat from the closet and slipping it on. He wanted to leave right away before his parents changed their mind.

“I still think you’ll be subjecting yourself to unnecessary grief,” Damian told him.

Luke defiantly looked him in the eye. “It’s what I need to do.”

****

********

Luke’s hand shook as he slid the key into the lock. He hadn’t been here since leaving the morning of Noah’s accident. Before he unlocked the door, Luke rested his head against it, taking deep, calming breaths.

He could do this. 

He _needed_ to do this. 

“Stop being such a pussy, Snyder. Open the door,” he muttered. 

Taking another breath, Luke pushed open the door and stepped into the empty apartment. It was as if he and Noah had never lived there. Gone was every trace of their existence. Behind him the door slammed shut – just like a slap in the face. 

“Fuck,” he whispered, frozen in the entryway. His eyes scanned the empty room, filling in the missing furniture and pictures. All he had now were memories. “Fuck…fuck…fuck.” Luke slumped against the door, slowly sliding down until his butt hit the floor. 

This was no longer their home. Luke was nearly leveled by this fact. Tears flooded his eyes as the apartment became one big blur. He’d spent some of his favorite moments with Noah here. And now it was all gone. 

Luke buried his head in his hands, shoulders shaking violently as the harsh reality of his life hit him full force. Their plans, hopes, and dreams had been taken away by one cruel twist of fate. He should never have gone to Damian. He knew how Damian tended to operate. Luke hadn’t bothered to take the time to think about the consequences. All he wanted was Mason gone.

He sure as hell got that, but at a terrible price.

Luke sat there crying, shedding tears for what had been and what might never be because of his jealousy. Finally he was gasping for air, no more tears left. He wiped his runny nose on the back of his sleeve and forced himself to stand up and deal. He’d made this bed.

Balling his hands into fists, Luke took at couple of tentative steps into the living room, which was really the heart of the apartment. They spent the most time in this room – Noah working on notes for his movie, Luke pouring over bland business documents for Grimaldi Shipping, watching a movie (usually one of Noah’s), or making love. They did that quite a bit in this room, whether it was on the sofa, floor, or even up against the wall. 

Luke’s favorite memory in this room wasn’t anything specific. It was the quiet times they’d lie together on the sofa quietly talking or just holding each other. Tears threatened to fall again, but he quickly blinked them away, marching into the kitchen. 

Luke ran his hand along the Formica countertop. A smile worked its way onto Luke’s lips as he remembered the first time they had sex in here – the struggle to get the right angle, the awkwardness that ensued until they finally found the perfect position. 

 

_“Baby, you gotta get up on the counter,” Noah instructed, “it’s the only way this is going to work.”_

_“But I want to top.”_

_“If you think I’m doing it on the tile floor you’re crazy.”_

_“Where’s your sense of adventure, Mayer?”_

_Noah promptly picked him up, setting Luke’s bare ass on the countertop. Before Luke could further goad Noah, his boyfriend was spreading Luke’s legs apart, tongue seeking out his hole…_

 

Who needed adventure when they could be the recipient of one Noah’s amazing rim jobs? 

_Will I ever get another one from him?_

Luke pushed the thought aside and opened the refrigerator, not sure what he was looking for, and was met with an echo chamber. It had been cleared of every last item. Same with the freezer. Luke wondered what happened to their food. Was it just thrown away without any thought? There had been chicken thawing in the refrigerator. Luke had planned on trying to cook it for dinner as a surprise for Noah after a long day of shooting his film. Maybe it was for the best it was long gone, since Luke probably would have ruined that too.

Luke wandered out of the kitchen and into the bathroom. The tub stood bare of the blue and white striped shower curtain that had once adorned it. Noah had picked out the curtain during their first shopping trip for apartment supplies. Luke remembered teasing him that he was surprised it wasn’t plaid. 

Gingerly he touched the white shower tiles. Many times they’d shared a shower. Luke loved when Noah would wash Luke’s hair, gently messaging his scalp. His hair always seemed extra clean once Noah was done with it. And Luke always had fun washing Noah.

 

_“Come on, Noah,” Luke said, taking the sponge out of Noah’s hand. “My tongue is so much better than a loofah.”_

 

Luke loved runny soapy hands over Noah’s pale, wet skin, which seemed to go on forever. Noah would just close his eyes and smile when Luke bathed him. Once he quietly confessed he never remembered his mom giving him a bath. And the Colonel…well…one could only imagine. 

There was one room left. Their bedroom. 

Luke stepped inside the empty space. It didn’t even smell like them anymore. This room would never see as much love as it had when it was theirs. They’d decorated it together – a hodgepodge of Luke’s bedroom furniture, Noah’s movie posters, and a comforter from Lily.

He missed sleeping together, being cocooned with Noah, feeling so safe and loved. The sound of Noah’s deep breathing would lull him to sleep. Luke even missed the occasional jab in the ribs Noah would give him if his snoring got too loud. 

The last time they’d made love had been in this room. It was the night before the accident. Noah had been underneath him, so tight, sweaty and beautiful. Their coupling had been quick and intense. 

 

_Noah grabbed Luke’s ass, trying to pull him deeper inside. “Harder, baby…harder.”_

 

Luke hadn’t lasted much longer after that. If he’d only known…

Tears streamed down his face. It couldn’t have been their last time together. Luke refused to believe it. They’d make it through this nightmare. There wasn’t anything they couldn’t overcome together.

But they weren’t together. Noah was far away – both physically and mentally. Luke wondered if they’d ever be close again.

“We will,” he muttered, wiping the tears from his eyes. “I won’t let him go. Never.”

Luke marched out of the bedroom, through the living room, and out the apartment door, without looking back.


End file.
